Peer pressure, along with bullying and drugs, is a subject that frightens many parents, and it seems that parents of boys are particularly worried about these issues. Quite apart from not wanting the expense of providing the ‘in’ trainers, designer leisurewear, and the very latest in computerized home entertainment, we like to believe that our sons will be sufficiently independent to withstand the pull of the peer group, especially when they become involved in illegal activities.

If you are a parent:

* Don’t drive your son into the arms of antisocial friends by being negative/constantly critical; the best way to help him resist them is to nurture his self-esteem and give him inner strength
* If he wants expensive clothes/games, facilitate his contribution towards their cost through saving regular pocket money or (if old enough) his part-time earnings
* Ask him to question whether people who won’t allow him to be different are truly friends
* Remember, boys who are open to peer pressure are impressionable; help him feel that he is acceptable as he is

If you are a teacher:

* Be aware of the power of peer groups to divert some boys from their studies; a befrienders’ scheme can offer vulnerable boys a listening ear

* Discuss the issue of peer pressure frequently in assembly, English or PSE lessons

* Many boys who are seduced away from learning are vulnerable because they are already failing; identify those who might be led astray as early as possible and offer them mentoring to keep them on track

Children generally love to conform and hate to be different. Their earliest flirtation with independence from parents and self-expression is frequently via the safe route of fashion, and the younger they are when they choose their own clothes, music and so on, the more likely this is to be. Not all peer groups are insidious.

Related posts:

1. The Basics of How to Parent Your Boys: Find Good Support Groups

2. The Basics of How to Parent Your Boys: Cherish and Trust Yourself

3. The Basics of How to Parent Your Boys: Be His Last Point of Refuge

4. The Basics of How to Parent Your Boys: Let Him Say No

5. The Basics of How to Parent Your Boys: Fortify His Heart, Don’t Thicken His Skin

6. The Basics of How to Parent Your Boys: Support and Encourage, Don’t Control and Push

7. The Basics of How to Parent Your Boys: Minimize Conflicts At Home

8. The Basics of Parenting Your Boys: Accept His Friends

9. The Basics of How to Parent Your Boys: Support the School

10. The Basics of How to Parent Your Boys: Nurture His Social Skills